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Monday, January 31
Seen in a Document
"How far were you in this room from the window that you described talking to him through?"
Ack! Labels: proofreading
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Civics 101
Well, this is disturbing.
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Sunday, January 30
Three-Part Harmony
What do you get when you take some of my favorite songs and mash them together? Well, you get this. How cool.
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Friday, January 28
There Can Be Only One, Part III
Ack! I should be keeping better track of the other Immortals. They're popping up in Scottsdale, Washington State and Japan.
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Have Some Cake
It's Sarah Mclachlan's birthday. Yay! How about we all just worship her instead? Okay, fine, can we at least make her Empress of the World? No? In that case, have some cake and then go visit one of her charities.
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"Unraveling of Life's Threads"
It should come as no surprise that Cal Thomas and I do not agree. To date, I can't think of a single column he has written with which I didn't disagree in some fashion, so I'm not startled in the least by my disagreements with him today. His column today was essentially a scare tactic setting up a false "choice" whereby the country must either choose to let religion set the rules for society in general and the courts in particular, or watch the definition of "life" inevitably become so meaningless that the State can legally kill any citizen it wants.
My specific criticisms of the piece:
(a) "We know where the first right comes from. It comes from our Creator." Although Mr. Thomas is entitled to this opinion, it is neither a fact nor a universally held belief. Obviously I disagree.
(b) "The courts' new "standard" can be opinion polls, resolutions passed by the American Medical Association or a whim." The suggested threat is made clear in this sentence. A "whim" will replace divine revelation, and those are the only two options. I would suggest that Mr. Thomas must not be familiar with non-religious forms of ethics (such as Humanism, to which I subscribe) which are a completely viable (and to me preferable) third option, except that I think it's highly likely he knows of and discards such systems simply because they don't acknowledge his deity.
(c) "Declare one category unfit to live, and all categories are at risk." He makes this his closing thesis, despite the fact that he openly supports capital punishment, which he describes as "just desserts" for people who "deserve to have their lives taken from them." I would call that a pretty clear example of "declaring one category unfit to live."
(d) Although he uses a generic "Creator," it's obvious which religious system he wants to use as the basis for law, and it ain't Hinduism or the Aboriginal Dreamtime. Suppose he'd go for a daily lottery to determine which religion's moral code we're using each day? We could have Wicca Wednesdays and Sikh Saturdays!
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There Can Be Only One, Again
Linde is looking out for me by pointing out where the other Immortals are. I should get on with those sword lessons . . .
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Thursday, January 27
Wow, Big Day for Sex
All on the same day, from Yahoo:
" Moan tones" from a porn star for your cellphone.
A bus driver with some judgment problems in Athens.
Something's on fire in the firehouse.
Other people's sweat as an aphrodisiac?
I didn't even search for "sex." Honest. Today, anyway.
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Wednesday, January 26
We'll Have Hyperspace in No Time
I saw an article today about a European moon probe using an ion engine. Straight from the pages of science fiction, into modern science. :)
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Signs From Heaven
I saw an article on Yahoo!News today about a ten-pound meteorite that landed in a field in Cambodia today (which is cool). And then the wonderful writers at Yahoo had to go and insert some subjective statement into the article on a whim (I'm seeing a pattern here).
"Sok Sareth said some villagers reportedly wanted to turn it into a shrine . . . Cambodians, particularly in rural areas, are typically superstitious."
So praying to a rock that fell from the sky is a superstition, but praying to a statue of the Virgin Mary or a city in the Middle East five times a day or a big wooden cross is a religion. I think the last sentence in the article should be rewritten to be "Humans, particularly humans everywhere, are typically superstitious."
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Happy Happy Happy Birthday!
On this date, 52 years ago, in the small town of Oshkosh, Nebraska, Roy Lynn Cooper was born. Growing to become a man of excellent character and integrity, he would go on to carve a niche for himself as one of the finest general contractors in western Nebraska, along the way fathering four children, one of whom has a Web log that he's currently using to announce his father's age to the world. ;)
Actually, my dad doesn't read my Web log very often, but some of the family members who will see him today do (and if you're one of them and forgot it was today, well, you still have a few minutes, the Kwik-Stop is still open).
In any event, happy birthday, dad. :) Labels: birthdays
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Monday, January 24
20q Needs a Girlfriend
It looks like a lot of people have been having fun with 20q. I'm glad everyone enjoyed it. ;) I think, though, that it needed a female programmer on the staff.
"2. Is it furry?" Um, I guess so.
"5. Does is slobber?" Hrm.
"6. Do you wash it?" Um . . .
"10. Is it annoying?" Ack.
On question 19 it correctly guessed "a woman." And then it argued with me about some of my answers:
"Would you use it daily? You said No, I say Yes." (I think it needs to define "use.")
"Can you put something into it? You said No, I say Yes." (Um . . .)
"Would you pay to use it? You said No, I say Yes." (Hrm.)
"Can you use it with your friends? You said No, I say Yes."
"Is it heavy? You said No, I say Yes." (No comment.)
It's "Uncommon Knowledge about a woman" list is even worse:
Uncommon Knowledge about a woman
Does a basketball player use it? I say Yes.
Can it be hunted? I say Yes.
Is it dangerous? I say Yes.
Would you eat its fruit? I say Probably.
Does it bounce? I say Yes.
Can you eat off of it? I say Yes.
Does it conduct electric current? I say Probably.
Can you ride on it? I say Yes.
Do you hold it when you use it? I say Yes.
Is it originally from Canada? I say Probably.
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Idiots
These guys need to take a civics class so they can learn that "interfering with the democratic process" does not equal "cool."
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Better for Whom?
Caught in an Op-Ed on Yahoo!News: In response to a recently published book suggesting that Abraham Lincoln was gay, The Nation published a cartoon by Robert Grossman of Ol' Abe dressed up as a woman (actually, a little more than "dressed" as a woman; those D-cups aren't part of the clothing) with a caption that said the "newly discovered" picture lent support to the book's thesis. The Nation came under fire for perpetuating the stereotype of gay men always dressing like women (and conversely of cross-dressers always being gay). The sampling of letters they published explain the criticism better than I could summarize, but the thing that caught my attention was Grossman's not-all-that-apologetic apology:
When I read [the] review . . . the words "Babe Lincoln" suddenly ran through my mind, rendering me helpless. In the impoverished mental landscape of a cartoonist this is what passes for true inspiration. I knew that gay men were not necessarily effeminate, cross-dressers or bearded ladies but I couldn't let that prevent me from having my laugh. Better a cheap and infantile joke than no joke at all . . .
What? It's not his fault because the idea of the cartoon "rendered him helpless"? Where was this excuse when I was in school? "I know you assigned a paper on the structure of the Executive Branch, but I was rendered helpless by this idea of George Bush being a transvestite, so I wrote a story about that instead." And you know, I don't think "having my laugh" is part of a cartoonist's job description. Traditionally, it's more about "my audience having a laugh." He'd have been better off just apologizing without trying to excuse it (or not apologizing at all if that's his actual opinion).
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Sunday, January 23
A Thought for the Children
I attended a seminar on human rights violations in Palestine sponsored by Nebraskans for Peace tonight. It was kind of a depressing presentation. I don't really know enough about the topic to comment, other than to say that it's sad to see children suffer the effects of conflict. Every child should have a happy childhood.
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It's a Lightsaber, Dammit
The true sign of geekdom: I signed up for a "Lightsaber Combat" class at Metro on Friday. At least, I think I did. The woman on the phone was a little confused and had to ask me the course number three times. I guess I'll see if I actually get a packet or not. I tried to spread some of the geekiness out amongst my acquaintances, but everyone else was busy with other trivial things, like real life. Which just means I'll make Jedi Master before they do. ;) Seriously, though, it sounds like fun. I knew that the fight choreographer for the new Star Wars movies had adapted historical fighting styles for each Star Wars character. Now I'll get to learn what they are. The instructor for the class also teaches a non-Metro swordfighting class and if this class goes well, maybe I'll start taking lessons full time.
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Friday, January 21
The Evolution of Gender Roles
Spotted first on Amanda's blog and then re-encountered in today's World-Herald (which I'm finally getting again after a week and a half of "difficulty"): twin articles by Maureen Down and Tom Purcell about gender roles in today's society in response to the infamous "women are innately less capable of holding top science and engineering positions than men" comments made recently by Harvard University President Lawrence Summers.
The gist of Dowd's mournful article is that "men" (the ubiquitous "men" stereotype, as though all carriers of the Y-chromosome are in some big club with a secret handshake and an insanely huge e-mail newsletter) are only interested in demure, subservient caricatures of the female form, there to provide sex, children and housekeeping but without forming thoughts more complex than "what needs to go on the grocery list this week?" Evolution, she says, is behind it, as men instinctively want to reduce the chances of their spouses cheating on them in order to pass on their genes, and "Men think that women with important jobs are more likely to cheat on them."
Purcell's article, on the other hand, is a mocking ("Maureen, Maureen, Maureen . . .") response to Dowd's article that jumps feet first into the stereotype pool by characterizing all successful, accomplished women as "neurotic, stressed out and unpleasant" and only capable of talking about "her job . . . her career and . . . all the idiots who are standing in the way of her next promotion." According to him, all men want a "soft, feminine, eloquent creature."
I think they're both full of crap.
Dowd's despairing dialogue insists that evolution wants men to pick subservient partners who won't cheat, but it ignores that evolution also wants men to pick partners who will provide their offspring with the greatest opportunities for success (the better to pass his genes on to future generations), and having an intelligent, successful partner would confer advantages on your offspring. She also doesn't mention that, although evolution influences us, it is not some overwhelming program we're incapable of refusing: if it were, all men would refuse monogamy, using all of our energy and every opportunity to pass our genes on to offspring with as many partners as possible. Humans, perhaps uniquely, have reason (to greater or lesser degrees), which allows us to ignore such evolutionary impulses as "the guy hitting on your date is a threat; kill him." There are far more complex influences involved than "men want subservient women because they won't cheat."
Purcell's article, well, what is there to say? He jumps from stereotype to stereotype before speaking for the whole of malekind by saying that "we" don't want a successful woman because she is "like us" (as though all men are successful or even that ambitious). Considering I exist completely outside that stereotype, the entire article is kind of meaningless to me (like a high school football jock explaining to a reporter what kind of women he likes while those of us in the Philosophy Club look on in alien incomprehension). I like powerful, independent women. Graduate degrees are sexy. I like "women who kick" (to quote Purcell). I hope to see a woman president in my lifetime. Equality is far preferable to subservience.
Gender roles are changing, whether people like it or not. The 1800s woman who didn't go to school and wasn't allowed to wear pants is long gone. The 1950s woman who responded to her husband's every command with "yes, dear" is fast fading. Patriarchal monopolies are overrated.
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Step Right Up, Ladies and Gentlement
Try your hand against the amazing AI known as 20Q. Pick a common object and see if the program can guess it. ;)
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Thursday, January 20
Why Don't I Ever Get Cases Like This?
I've yet to have a reference to " almost shooting my nephew because he wouldn't come out from under the bed" in any of my projects at work. And the whole "she still had her teeth" thing? Ewwwww.
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Whoops
I can just see this guy's panic. "Gah, I lost it! Do I go back for it? Have they found it? Do they know what's in it?"
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Tuesday, January 18
Wow, I Thought It Was Cold Here
Cindy pointed out today that it was -54 degrees in a town in Minnesota yesterday. Ouch. And that's not even a record (the record is -60). You know, I hear Arizona is nice this time of year . . .
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I Am So Never Going to Brazil
Last month's Discover had an article (number 32 in it's list of Top 100 science stories of the year) about a parasite discovered in Brazil ( Trypanosoma cruzi) that not only infects the host, but also inserts its own DNA into the host's DNA, and it's a permanent genetic change that is passed on to the host's offspring. In lab tests, after infecting a chicken with the parasites, they've found the parasites' DNA in the DNA of all of the chicken's offspring. They don't yet know what the genetic modification does, but just the fact that it's there is creepy as hell. Can we say The Fly?
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Sunday, January 16
I Need To Learn Flash
Courtesy of Lane, the Gollum Rap.
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Ah! It's Spreading!
Seen at Wal-Mart tonight: The same bloody pictures debunked in the previous post, carefully framed and set on a table with a jar for donations. Judging by the fact that the nearest Wal-Mart employee was wearing a shirt that said "You can agree with me or you can be wrong" (charming uniform . . .), somehow I don't think telling them they're perpetuating a hoax is going to go over well.
At least their heart was in the right place, although personally I'm going to send my donations directly to the Red Cross.
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Friday, January 14
Correcting People for Fun and Profit
One of the consequences of being an information sponge is that on a semi-regular basis I end up in situations where I know that something another person is putting forth is factually inaccurate. Most often this happens with urban legends and e-mail forwards (to the point that my family doesn't include me on their e-mail forwards anymore). Case in point: yesterday a woman at my office was viewing "shocking photos of people fleeing the tsunami" that she'd received in an e-mail forward. In kind of an awkward position, I continued walking instead of gathering to look at the photos, because (a) I'd already seen them and (b) they weren't of the tsunami (they were from a "tourist attraction" in China). I'm never quite sure how to react in those situations because I lack the people skills to correct a person without sounding pretentious, but at the same time I feel bad about allowing hoaxes and falsehoods to propogate through unwitting people (which wouldn't be a problem if people would be more skeptical of anything arriving with [FWD] in the subject). How do you tell someone they've been taken in by a hoax without making them feel ignorant? If I figure it out, I'll send it out in an e-mail forward.
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No Funny Title This Time
The National Geophysical Data Center has released a (very large - 20 MB) Quicktime animation of the propagation of the Indian Ocean tsunami around the world.
http://www.ngdc.noaa.gov/spotlight/tsunami/image/indo_gl2.mov
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I'm Going To Be Rich
Following hot on the heels of the " Virgin Mary in the grilled cheese" that sold for $28,000 on eBay some months back, another holy entrepreneur is selling a pan with what he claims is the face of Jesus in the bottom of it (judging by the complete lack of bids, I think it's a somewhat subjective image; one of my acquaintances thought it looked more like Jason Alexander from "Seinfeld").
Still, I think I have a guaranteed money maker, because lo and behold, Leonardo da Vinci is sending me secret messages encoded in fractals in the dried egg in the bottom of my mixing bowl! This should make at least $10K on eBay, easy.
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We Pissed Off Somebody's God . . .
It was 24 degrees out when I went to bed yesterday morning at 5 a.m. It was 8 when I got up at 1:30 p.m. It was -1 when I went to get food for the department. And now it's -6. Gah! It's officially "your nostrils freeze together when you breath in sharply" cold.
I need to get a warmer jacket.
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Wednesday, January 12
Mark of the Beast, Redux
A few years ago, Omaha and a couple of other counties abandoned the long-standing vehicular plating standards that the rest of the state still uses. Instead of beginning with a designated county number (i.e., 77 for my home county), we now have a 3-letter/3-number combination, which increased the odds of unintentionally meaningful or humorous plates. I remember a call-in show right after the plates came out that featured a caller angry that his plates began with OBL, which he called the "Osama Bin Ladan plate."
Yesterday in the parking lot of the UPS center I saw a plate that said "NOT 666," which almost appears to be a personalized plate showing the owner's defiance toward the antichrist. I wonder how many comments he gets.
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Monday, January 10
All the News That's Fit To Print, and Some That's Not
Yahoo usually posts seven or eight news headings on its main page as a "brief summary" of the Yahoo!News page. At the moment, the bottom two are about, respectively:
(a) The discovery of a trio of supergiant stars with masses 1,500 bigger than that of our star and diameters that would take up space in our solar system past the orbit of Jupiter.
(b) A baseball player punching a cameraman.
One of these is worthy of human study and appreciation and pushes our knowledge forward. The other is sensationalist garbage pandering to the lowest common denominator (but which will still get more page views than the other). It's sad that more people watch "Jerry Springer" than "Nova."
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That's Dr. Cooper to You
While Amanda is busy studying and preparing a thesis, I'm going to leapfrog ahead of her " without studying or taking exams". That's right, I can get my own doctorate in a subject of my choice (and they'll even add a subject if they don't have it) for only $199. At that rate, I may get two or three. "Jay Cooper, Doctor of English, Women's Spirituality and Jedi Studies." I'm sure any university would accept them. They're accredited, after all.
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Coping
Published in the Public Pulse in the Jan. 5 issue of the Omaha World-Herald:
How do atheists cope?
In answer to Sharon Sobel's Dec. 29 letter of joy at so many of life's gifts and her plea for no prayers of condescension over her atheist philosophy, I applaud her ability to enjoy life's simple pleasures. It would appear that she is one of those rare people who really do take time to stop and smell the roses. Would that more of us could do the same.
Something I do find lacking in her letter, though, is how she copes with life during tragedy or adversity like sudden unemployment, serious illness, betrayal of friends or family or, worst of all, the death of someone very close. And where does she find consolation or guidance when world problems seem too overwhelming for one person to offer solutions?
My Christian friends and I have often wondered how we would survive if not for the gift of faith - in a God who both celebrates our joys and consoles us in our grief. Many times, my prayer is but one of thanksgiving to God for just being here, to share in my accomplishments and to lead me in other directions when I fail.
Barbara Sawatzki, Omaha
It's refreshing to see a polite inquiry into atheism, even if the underlying message is clear. The usual inquiries aren't normally so polite (actually, we don't normally get inquiries; usually its more of a dismissive judgment). So, since this woman asked so politely, I'll formulate an answer.
Her point seems to be that without a belief to hold her together during her times of trial, she feels she would self-destruct, the implication being, as I understand it, that because "everything will be okay in the end" (once the good people end up in Heaven and the bad people don't) these temporary trials become bearable. Missing from this is, from the perspective of atheists, an important point: whether or not the belief is true. It seems the height of intellectual dishonesty to believe something simply because it makes you feel good (this is not the reason most theists believe it, of course, but it is the reason Ms. Sawatzki gives in her post). I'd like to believe in all sorts of things that would make me feel good. I'd like to believe I'm going to live forever and none of my friends and family will ever die, I'd like to believe that nothing bad will ever happen to me and I'd like to believe that when I wake up tomorrow there will be $25 million in my bank account, but I know these things are untrue, and I can't force myself to believe in something I know to be untrue. This is not to say I don't have hopes and dreams for the future, but they're hopes and dreams I know that I will have to bring about.
Ironically, the capacity to believe what cannot be known ("faith") appears to have benefits to humans (which is probably why evolution selected for it). I'm sure Ms. Sawatzki does find comfort in her faith, and it helps shield her. But so do the religions of every other theist on the planet. There's nothing inherent in her religion that would convince an atheist to take it up.
As to her question itself, it's a good one, and it's one I wish I was asked more often because it actually shows an open inquiry. I can only answer from my perspective (atheism isn't a codified religion-like structure with specific tenets, so I can't speak for all of us), but I will openly admit that I, at times, feel sad, depressed and overwhelmed (ask Lisa about my response to the tsunami in Asia). It's a standard human emotional response. But there are also days when I'm happy, and I know that there will be days when I'm happy again. Emotions are transient. I have friends to listen to me vent, and I have my hopes and dreams for the future. I guess I don't understand the need for an invisible third party; all of its traditional jobs are already taken by real people. I also don't feel the need for its "guidance"; reason and the reasonable advice of friends and those more knowledgeable than myself seem more likely to produce results than what is, in effect, waiting and hoping for the best. (I'm likely to irritate some people with that last line, but that's the blunt perspective of atheists on prayer.) The theist perspective is that atheists are "missing" something and they can't fathom how we function without it. The atheist perspective is that we aren't missing it in the first place. We cope by accepting the things that we cannot change and understanding that we can try (we may not always do it, but we have the option) to change things that are not yet set.
The Pulse letter specifically mentions the death of loved ones, which is a topic that, to be honest, from the atheist/theist perspective, puzzles me. When I attend a funeral, I have no belief that the deceased still exists or that I will ever see him/her again. On the other hand, the theist position (at least in Christianity) is that the person is now in Heaven. Very few theists believe they're going to Hell, so as a result they must believe that they will someday see the deceased again, in Heaven, which makes the parting more of a "see you later" than a "goodbye forever" (as atheists hold). So I don't understand the sorrow and mourning that accompany death. I really don't. If Heaven is really as great as it's made out to be, I would think that theists would hold parties and celebrate.
As to coping in general, the usual question is "What's the point? If you're going to die eventually, why bother living?" In response, one of my favorite atheist sites used the following analogy: Why bother building a snowman? It's pointless, and in a week it's going to start melting; in a month there will be no evidence that it ever existed. The answer: Because it's fun. Because it's enjoyable. More importantly, it's fun and enjoyable while we're doing it. Although we plan for the future and think about where we'll be down the road, we don't live in the future. We live in the here and now. From the atheist perspective, we get one shot and one shot only, and its up to us to make the most of it.
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Let It Snow, Let It Snow, Let It Snow . . . Somewhere Else
We had our first big snowstorm of the year (in January, which is really late) last week. Something like 13 inches. It created an instant wonderland, resplendent in winter glory. It also introduced me to the pleasure of homeownership known as " shoveling" (which, I say with no reservation, is highly overrated). It made the streets perilous for those without an SUV (the two days of the year when those behemoths are actually used to their capacities); I got stuck on this street a few minutes before I took this picture.
Look for rising temperatures and melting snow over the next few days, reducing the crisp whiteness to a diseased grey. Enjoy it while it's there.
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Friday, January 7
Who Says We Need More Science?
I'm glad to see the educational requirements for the science writers at Yahoo!News are stringent.
"Predatory insects, like the wolf spider, do not have access to the barrage of diet advice thrust at people, but they still manage to vary what they eat to get balanced nutrition, research shows."
In which grade did we learn that spiders aren't insects?
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Thursday, January 6
Wait, what?
Tonight at a fast food restaurant:
Cashier: "Okay, that will be $11.74."
Me: "Okay."
Cashier: "Would you like that to be less than it is?"
Possible answers:
(a) "That depends. What do I have to do? Does it involve nudity or snow?"
(b) "No, actually, I'd like it to be more. Here's $15. Keep the change."
(c) Jay's actual answer: *confused look* "Um . . ."
Turns out he saved me 40 cents by combining two of the items into a combo, which was nice of him.
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At Linde's Request . . .
I'm posting some pictures of the blanket she made me for Christmas. Thanks, Linde. :)
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Tuesday, January 4
Wanted
I want a girl with a short skirt and a long jacket.
And some boots.
And a really nice computer system.
And some Cherry Vanilla Dr. Pepper.
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Seen on a Tech Support "Humor" Page
Tech Support: "All right...now double-click on the File Manager icon."
Customer: "That's why I hate this Windows -- because of the icons -- I'm a Protestant, and I don't believe in icons."
Tech Support: "Well, that's just an industry term sir. I don't believe it was meant to --"
Customer: "I don't care about any 'Industry Terms'. I don't believe in icons."
Tech Support: "Well...why don't you click on the 'little picture' of a file cabinet...is 'little picture' ok?"
Customer: [click]
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Monday, January 3
You Can Never Have Too Much Emergency Preparedness
Enough said.
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Sunday, January 2
I Need This Like I Need a Hole in the Head
Mom, don't read this post.
So I got a new computer desk for Christmas that uses these bolt-thingies that screw into the main desk platform and then hang down and bolt into the cabinets below it. I put the desk together last Sunday, and I put all of the bolts into the main platform before realizing four of them were for the keyboard tray, which I didn't use. So I took them out, except one of them stripped out and I couldn't get it out with the screwdriver. I said to myself "I'll remember to remove this bolt-thingy the next time I go downstairs and pick up my Vice Grips." Well, guess what. I didn't. So later whilst hooking up my computer and kneeling beneath the desk, I stood up directly underneath it. It hit me at the very top at the back of my head and put me on the floor (followed immediately thereafter by me swearing in only one language, but only because I only know swear words in one language). I've had a low-grade headache the entire week (so I apologize to anyone with whom I've been short); Lisa is fairly certain I had a mild concussion. But it didn't poke into the skull, so I'm lucky I have a hard head.
You read it anyway, didn't you, mom?
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