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Happy Valentine's Day!

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There's something for everyone in Valentine's Day.  Even for those with no amorous diversion there's still the treat factor involved in a fabricated holiday.  Chocolate!  Candies!  And . . . sugar cookies!

How To Make Sugar Cookies That Impress Your Sweetheart
(Or Your Coworkers)


Step 1:  Normally I would start with a step that you should do, but as an interesting change (and because I had some problems with this recipe), let's insert, at completely random intervals, some steps that you should most emphatically not do.  So . . .

Jay's Step 1 of Things That You Should Not Do:  While assembling the ingredients, and after deciding to fill the sugar container, do not drop a full package of sugar onto a bowl of eggs and then spill sugar all over the counter and the floor.  This adds a considerable amount of time to the baking process . . .




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If you insist, despite the warning, to follow this path, your next step is to spend ten minutes sweeping the floor and brushing sugar off the counter (preferably into a dust pan).

Cleaning a cup of sugar off the floor is a tremendous pain.

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It's also hard on the eggs.   Poor Humpty isn't very photogenic now.
Okay, on to the real recipe.   Finally.

Step 1 (for real this time):   Assemble the ingredients.

1/2 c. shortening
1/2 c. butter
1-1/2 c. sugar
3 eggs
1 tsp. vanilla
2-1/2 c. flour
1/4 tsp. salt
1 tsp. baking powder

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Step 2:  Combine the solid fats.  Mmmmm.

Step 3:   Cover the solid fats with a large quantity of sugar.  We have the beginnings of a great snack here..

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Step 4:  Add the eggs and vanilla.  Humpty has held out this long (just leaking occasionally), but it's time for him to take one for the team.
Step 5:  Set up the mixer.  This time I actually remembered to put the beaters into the mixer before I plugged it in . . .  Are you surprised I still have all my fingers?

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Step 6:  Mix the ingredients.  Wheeeeee!

Yum.   Sugar and butter are the base ingredients of most desserts.

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Step 7:  Combine the dry ingredients.

Look, hearts are spontaneously appearing in the ingredients.  Love is in the air.

Look, another heart!

This would be a good time for Jay's Step 2 of Things You Should Not Do:  Do not put the flour in a bowl, misread the recipe card and then add four times the amount of salt the recipe requires.  Gah.  I'm not sure what that would do to the cookies, but I don't think it would be good.  If you do happen to do this, dump the flour and start Step 7 over again.

(I told you I had some trouble with this recipe.)

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Step 8:  Combine the liquid and dry ingredients and chill for one hour.  (Chill the mixture, that is.   Getting down with some jazz is purely optional.)

Step 9:   Turn the dough out onto a floured (not flowered) surface.

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Roll the dough to around 1/8 inch thick.

Presto.   One really big cookie.  If you could get it in the oven.

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Step 10:  Cut out cookies with your cute little heart-shaped cookie cutters.
Step 11:  Transfer the cookies to a cookie sheet and dust with colored sugar.  Bake at 375 degrees for 8-10 minutes.  (That's not the same as baking at 750 degrees for 4-5 minutes . . .)

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Voila!  One batch of cookies, fresh from the oven.




The completed batch, ready for transport.   Guaranteed to impress any object of your affection (objects of your infection are your business). 


Notice:  Cookies are not actually guaranteed to impress the object of your affection.  No guaranty or warranty of any sort is hereby made by the author of this page.  Besides, there are better ways to impress people than cookies.  Try dinner and bowling or a nice walk in the park.  Or a diamond.  But don't put the diamond in the cookies.  Advice is void where prohibited by law.

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