| I don't know any of my neighbors. I've lived in my
apartment now for almost four years, and after making an attempt the first week to
"be neighborly" that resulted in some awkwardness I now do what everyone else in
my complex does: I say "hi" to people in the hallway but I don't invite them
over for coffee. It's not that we're all unfriendly, I don't think. We just
don't have the kind of investment in our "homes" that, say, homeowners do.
Omaha is not a "big city," but it's big enough that people lock their
doors. I've never had any serious complaints about any of my neighbors (one of my
newer neighbors has an unfortunate enthusiasm for loud, bass-heavy music and several of my
neighbors leave their junk mail on top of the mailboxes, but none of them pound on my door
drunk at 4 a.m.). So I was a little shocked and displeased last week to see this
show up, written in ink on the bulletin board above the mailboxes in the main hall. 
Whoever wrote this (I have no idea who it was, although I know it wasn't me and I'm
pretty sure it's not the tenant in Apartment 12 . . .) obviously thinks there's a problem.
Not living on the same floor with Apartment 12, I can't vouch for the source.
But the Mad Inker clearly thinks something is wrong. When I saw this I was,
at first, shocked by the complete idiocy involved in writing on a bulletin board (that's
permanently attached to the wall) with an ink pen. Then I was upset at the content
of the message (I don't have any direct experience with child abuse, and I hope I never
do). I stewed about it on my drive to work. Why didn't the Inker call the
police or protective services? Did s/he think this was the best way to handle
it? Did s/he think Apartment 12 would stop? What would the rest of the tenants
think? Was this more of a "tattling" (to turn the opinion of the complex
against Apartment 12)? If so, it would have very limited effectiveness because I
wouldn't recognize the tenant of Apartment 12 or the Mad Inker if I met them both
in the hallway.
The "note" was still there the next day when I went to work, but when I
returned home I found a "reply."
(Click to zoom in on the message.)
The reply is clearly from the tenant of
Apartment 12, and she (I'm assuming it's a she) gave the Inker an earful.
She's quite clearly upset, given the sarcastic bent ("allow me to share some
knowledge with you"), but it's also obvious that she sat down and took some time to
write this (there is only one typo and she even used "whom" correctly, not to
mention she took the time to cut and tape more paper to the bottom so she could continue
her train of thought). Despite her obvious indignation, she got her point across
fairly well. After reading her reply (and returning with my camera at 2 a.m. to
photograph it), I again mused about it for some time. Now I had two different sides
and no way to determine actual facts, and I began to see how difficult being a judge or
jury could be. Was it a case of a concerned tenant trying to protect a child through
misguided (and destructive) means? Or a spat between two tenants that spilled over
into the complex as one attempted to slander the other? I have no idea. I can
only hope that, if there was a problem, this prompted a proper
investigation. Child abuse is not a happy subject.
Two days later I returned home to find the original note and the reply both gone, in a
very amateurish fashion.
Whoever did the removal appears to have taken a knife (or a set of keys) and simply
scratched the offending message away, leaving an ugly scar (and a few visible letters) as
a reminder of the incident. If building maintenance was responsible, I'm very
disappointed in their technique. It's possible either the Mad Inker or Apartment 12
did it, although that's completely speculation. I'm hoping they'll eventually
replace the board entirely, but I'm not going to hold my breath.
The whole incident was unfortunate and made me examine the whole aspect of
"community" and the balance between protecting those who can't protect
themselves and respecting the privacy of other people. I've joked to one of
my friends that if I die before I turn 40, the most likely cause will be interfering in a
domestic dispute, so you can imagine what my position is on "minding your own
business," but at the same time this whole situation could have been handled much
more professionally with a quick call to protective services. I'm also curious
whether anyone in the building got involved, either to show support for Apartment
12 or contact authorities, and I wonder if the apartment management got involved.
I'll probably never know, since the people in my building don't talk to each other . . . |
|
Prevent Child Abuse
(A relevant link to today's topic.)
Prevent Domestic Abuse
(Another topic near and dear to my heart. Pick on someone your own size.) |
